13 Mistakes No One Can Afford To Make On A First Date

First dates can be nerve-wracking experiences, filled with anticipation and the hope of making a meaningful connection. Whether you met through a dating app, were set up by friends, or struck up a conversation at a coffee shop, the first impression you make can set the tone for future interactions. While it’s natural to feel a bit anxious, there are some common dating mistakes that can quickly turn a promising first date into a missed opportunity. Here are 13 mistakes no one can afford to make on a first date.

1. Being Late

Punctuality is key to showing respect for your date’s time. Arriving late sends the message that you’re disorganized or don’t value their time, which can start the evening off on the wrong foot. Being late is a huge dating mistake. If you find yourself running behind, make sure to communicate with your date. Believe it or not, many men and women will leave after 20 minutes if their date doesn’t show up.

2. Talking Too Much About Yourself

While it’s important to share information about yourself, dominating the conversation can come across as self-centered. Make sure to ask your date questions and show genuine interest in getting to know them as well. It may be helpful to think of meaningful questions to ask your date if the conversation wanes.

3. Checking Your Phone Constantly

Do you have somewhere else to be? Constantly checking your phone during a date is not only rude, but also signals that you’re not fully present. Keep your phone on silent and focus on engaging with your date. No one wants to date someone attached at the hip to their phone.

4. Being Negative or Critical

Nobody wants to spend time with someone who is constantly complaining or criticizing others. Keep the conversation positive rather than dwelling on the negative. While it’s OK to vent if you had a stressful day, try not to ruminate on negative topics. This could kill the mood very quickly.

5. Talking About Exes

Bringing up past relationships, especially in detail, is a major turn-off on a first date. In fact, 55% of men and women said that if their date talked about their ex, there wouldn’t be a second one. Instead, try to focus on the present moment and getting to know your date, rather than dwelling on the past.

6. Overindulging in Alcohol

While a drink or two can help ease nerves, overindulging in alcohol can lead to embarrassing behavior or cloud your judgment. In a recent survey, 70% of women respondents said that a date getting drunk is never OK. Pace yourself and know your limits.

7. Being Disrespectful to Service Staff

How you treat service staff can say a lot about your character. Being rude or dismissive towards waitstaff or other service workers is a major red flag for your date. Try to be respectful and polite to both your date and those around you to impress your date.

8. Talking About Controversial Topics

While it’s important to be authentic, discussing controversial topics like politics or religion on a first date can quickly derail the conversation and lead to unnecessary conflict. Save these discussions for later dates once you’ve established a rapport. If you do broach these topics, make sure that you are listening to your date’s point of view and try to find common ground.

9. Being Too Aggressive or Forward

Respect your date’s boundaries and avoid making them feel uncomfortable by being too aggressive or forward, whether physically or verbally. While some people value directness, especially in regards to dating, there is a fine line between being pushy or aggressive.

10. Not Listening

Active listening is an essential skill in any relationship. Show that you’re engaged in the conversation by listening attentively and asking follow-up questions. The conversation should flow naturally if you employ active listening skills.

11. Coming Across as Desperate

While it’s natural to want to make a good impression, coming across as desperate or needy can be off-putting. Avoid overwhelming your date with too much attention or making grand gestures too soon. It’s important to gage what your date is looking for in a potential relationship. Some men and women value independence and autonomy in relationships and others enjoy extra attention from their partners. This is a great question to ask during a first date.

12. Not Taking Care of Personal Hygiene

Personal hygiene is non-negotiable on a first date. Make sure to dress appropriately, groom yourself, and maintain good hygiene to make a positive impression. In the same light, if you are out at a restaurant, be mindful of how you are eating, and be sure not to make a mess.

13. Not Following Up

If you had a good time on the date and are interested in seeing your date again, don’t wait too long to follow up. Send a text or give them a call to express your appreciation and suggest another outing. Many of the rules of engagement after a date are antiquated. Don’t be afraid to be the first person to follow up if you truly had a good time on your date!

Acing The First Date

First dates are an opportunity to make a memorable impression and lay the foundation for a potential relationship. By avoiding these common mistakes, you can increase your chances of having a successful and enjoyable first date experience. Remember to relax, be yourself, and focus on getting to know your date as a person. If you avoid these first date mistakes, you’ll be one your way to a second date in no time.

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Teri Monroe

Teri Monroe started her career in communications working for local government and nonprofits. Today, she is a freelance finance and lifestyle writer and small business owner. In her spare time, she loves golfing with her husband, taking her dog Milo on long walks, and playing pickleball with friends.