Dining at Michelin-starred restaurants or an elegant old-world establishment is a special experience. But those rows of gleaming silverware and the hushed atmosphere can be intimidating. Don’t let fears of breaking fine dining etiquette put you off! Knowing a few key pointers will boost your confidence and let you focus on enjoying the culinary artistry.
1. Which Fork? Deciphering the Silverware
The golden rule of fine dining manners: start with the outermost utensils and work your way in with each course. Salad forks are smaller, while dessert forks and spoons are often placed above your plate. If unsure, discreetly watch other diners for guidance.
2. The Napkin Conundrum
Your napkin belongs on your lap throughout the meal, used for discreetly dabbing your lips. If you must leave the table, place it loosely on your chair – this signals you intend to return. Once finished, leave it neatly to the left of your plate as a sign for the waitstaff.
3. Bread and Butter Basics
Tear off bite-sized pieces of bread and butter them individually on your side plate. Resist the temptation to create a butter sandwich – this isn’t considered proper fine dining etiquette.
4. Cell Phones and Fine Dining
Silence your phone and put it away. Fine dining is about connection with those at the table. The distraction of devices is frowned upon. If you must take a truly urgent call, step away from the table and excuse yourself discreetly.
5. Soup’s On, Now What?
Tilt your soup bowl slightly away from you as you scoop to prevent spills. Sip quietly from the side of the spoon, avoiding slurps. Leaving a little soup at the bottom is perfectly acceptable and signals you’re ready for the next course.
6. Passing the Salt and Pepper
Always pass the salt and pepper together, even if someone only asks for one. They’re a pair in fine dining! Place them directly on the table in front of the person who requested them.
7. Oops! Handling Accidents Gracefully
Spills and dropped utensils happen. Simply signal to your server discreetly, and they’ll provide a replacement. Don’t make a fuss; these things are expected in a fine dining setting.
8. Pacing Yourself
Fine dining is designed to be savored. Mimic the pace of other diners and avoid rushing. Put your utensils down between bites, sip your wine slowly, and enjoy the conversation and ambiance.
9. Ordering Wine Like a Pro
If you’re the one ordering the wine, the sommelier will present the bottle and allow you to inspect the label. After that, they’ll typically pour you a small taste. This isn’t to judge if you like the wine, but to confirm it isn’t flawed.
10. The Art of Tipping
In fine dining restaurants, a gratuity between 15-20% is customary for good service. If the service was exceptional, feel free to show your appreciation with a bit more.
11. Restroom Etiquette
A simple “please excuse me for a moment” is all you need to say when nature calls. There’s no need to elaborate or announce your intentions to the entire table.
12. Making Conversation
Engage in light conversation focused on the food, the ambiance, and shared interests. Avoid controversial topics or dominating the conversation – let everyone have their turn to speak.
13. When You’re Finished
To signal you’ve finished your course, place your knife and fork parallel on your plate, with the tines of the fork facing up, resting at about the 4 o’clock position.
Remember the Fundamentals
Mastering fine dining etiquette is about respect and consideration, not rigid rules. Relax, savor the experience, and don’t hesitate to ask your server for guidance if needed.
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Randell Suba
Randell is an online media professional with more than 15 years of experience specializing in technology, finance, travel, cars, lifestyle, among others. He's passionate about helping people make informed decisions and find meaningful connections through his content. Let's talk about the things that make life a little more interesting.
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